Saturday, March 30, 2013

Pallas Athene in Taurus- Limited Edition

Most holy and pimped-out Palatua, its been a minute since we looked at what was going on with the Minor Planets, huh? This is quite ridiculous, frankly, and pretty much intolerable if I want to continue calling myself a Minor Planet Astrologer! Well, since the lady Pallas Athene keeps carrying on about it, I suppose we can do one of these to placate her for a minute.

The Warrior Princess has finally had it with all of Aries' shenanigans, and decides to head out for the greener pastures of Taurus. Once getting there and discovering that there is absolutely nothing happening and the rural life is nothing like what she thought it was, she decides to start a brand new campaign to unite the working class farmers and unionize against the oppressive regime of the city-dwelling Capricorn overlords.

As seemingly always with Our Lady Violence, this devolves into guerrilla warfare almost immediately.

After the smoke clears and the battles are fought, Pallas is installed as the new leader of the Athenian Associated Agrarian/ Agricultural Assembly (Or 5A) for short. When we leave her, she is only just barely visible over a veritable mountain of paperwork.

This transit is going to combine the tactical brilliance of Athene and the bloody-mindedness focus that Taurus is so famous for, a potent combination that will be much needed, with all this crazy high-energy Aries shenanigans that haven't even begun to start. The real magic here however, is in Athene's other gift/ dominion- Aside from being the goddess of Tactics and Wisdom, she is also the goddess of Crafting. This is going to be a time for you to get back to your roots and to re-commit to some kind of creative work, whatever that means to you. If you dont have anything like that, why dont you take something up? Taurus loves Art, anything to do with the body (dancing, bodypainting, cooking and eating, lots and lots of sex) and Vocal performing (acting, singing, lots and lots of sex). Explore that side of yourself, and have fun with it! This is a rockstar transit, so live it up!


As an aside, Hellraisers (and in that same track), this is some advice that I'm taking to heart here- Crazy huge things are brewing here at AG Central, and you're really going to want to stick around so that you can see what im cooking up! Stay frosty guys, because the awesomeness is incoming!

-The AstroGeek

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Full Moon in Libra- The Fight in the Dog

Welcome back to the Asylum, Hell-raisers! That's right, its Cardinal Crisis time all over again! And what do we say when I say say that, kids?


Ahhh, Aries... Refreshing, isnt it? That raw passion, the pure energy... Its intoxicating. This go around, the stage is pure Cardinal Crisis- The Cyprus banking crisis and the oligarchs of the EU who engineered it, problems with the drones and the implications of war, The fight over Equality in America, A new pope that breaks with tradition wherever you look, Climate change finally starting to get out of control, posion food, an incarcerated population, obesity, the war on terror/ drugs, It can make this life seem like a circus, and not the good kind. This is the nightmare circus, the one that drags you in, makes you lower your guard, then gets you alone, overwhelms your senses, and you wind up in a gutter realizing that there really was no zebra there at all (raising serious questions about your mental state...)

So what do you do? Well ladies and gentlemen, I tell you what you do- You dig deep and master yourself. You do this because its the only way to outlast the craziness- And I'm going to show you how to do it, so that you can outlast the crazy.

Muhfuggin Aries.... Alright, so this is borderline ridiculous. We have five planets within orb of a major stellium, all centering on Uranus, sextile Jupiter, inconjunct Saturn, and squaring Pluto? Gods help us. If there was any one thing to take away, its this- You don't get the luxury of being ignorant anymore. It is ON, and you better be prepared, starting 3 weeks ago- To the Hustler go the spoils! Anything that doesn't serve you anymore, release it. Search out your limiting beliefs (I'm not good enough, I don't have enough, I'm too ugly, I'm too broken....) and ANNIHILATE THEM. Do not hesitate, or they will continue to have you. Do not do battle with them, because if you do, then you play into their game and you lose right then. Instead, laugh at them. Affix your feet in the security of your soul and move with the gravity of your entire being against this thought that is so small, it has to hide in the darkest corners of your mind- Step into your glory: How can anything, much less something like that, stand against YOU? Wear a rubber band, and any time you feel yourself slipping back into those thought patterns, snap yourself out of it, literally! This is the time to create your new patterns, because they will gain momentum in Taurus.

The Sun, Moon, Venus, Mars and Uranus- So, aside from all that, other influences- Cyllarus shows that you need to get behind something. Find a cause and live for it so that you dont die for nothing down the road. A square to Kronos demands that you need to take a longer view. Look to your future. A sextile to Iris tells you to watch out for a sign or message coming your way. Listen to your gut, you'll recognize it when you see it. A conjunction to Hygeia implores that you listen to your body's needs and prioritize your health and fitness- A warrior needs to be in peak condition! An opposition to Typhon shows that you must not allow your emotions to carry you away- Stay in control of your words and actions. An opposition to Urania confirms this- Keep a diamond mind, and avoid tipping your hand. A trine to my favorite new centaur, Orius, shows that if you don't fight this, but instead work with it and make room for the changes that are occurring, then you will discover new wellsprings of passion and a lust for your life that you thought was long gone! Don't cling to what holds you back! Go wild! A sextile to Atropos confirms this, but tells you that you will need to cut yourself away from what you are trying to lean up against. I ask you this- Why lean and struggle to stand, when you could use your wings and fly free? A square to Narcissus lends a final warning however- You must conquer your ego before all else can take place. This isnt some airy-fairy crap, if you try to do any of this without subduing your own ego and making it work for you instead of the other way around, then it will just trip you up every step along the way. This can only be achieved by taking a hard look at yourself and where you are along your path. Do not flinch from the brutal truth- No, embrace it, because there's nothing else in this world that can set you free from the chains you bought for yourself. Let it burn away the guano that's caked onto your skin and expose the raw, clean skin underneath.

Mercury and Chiron- Yeah, I know I dont normally include Chiron in my Lunation list, but strange times call for furious dancing... Both of these guys are currently in Pisces and direct. So what happens when the Quicksilver Magician meets the Wounded Healer? Pure dead magic, as it turns out! A trine to Helio shows that this time right now is one for you to show yourself off and put yourself out there to the world. A square to Jupiter confirms this. Perfect timing, too- We could really use you in here. Another trine, to Saturn, confirms this, and warns you of the consequences of not stepping up to your personal best, and using this opportunity for the greatest good, with maturity and intention. Don't tempt the Grim Reaper. While we're on the subject, a sextile to the King of Hell gives you a rare chance to invoke some personal alchemy. When Pluto chooses to show you a weakness in yourself (as indicated above) use it to gain some awareness and transform it into a new strength by giving it up and allowing Pluto to show you a new way forward. This can only be done if you are willing to open up to the awareness of your weakness, rather than live in a delusion of invulnerability. A square to Orius helps you here, enabling you to access new paths once you step outside of your comfort zone and acknowledge that you don't have all of the answers just yet.

Jupiter, Saturn and Pluto- No, I haven't lost it, I promise. I told you this one was special! These guys are in a tight Yod (two planets quincunxing a third, while sextiling each other) so I'm taking them together. In fact, if you consider Mars, then all of a sudden you have a double Yod! A trine to Typhon ramps up the emotional turmoil, letting everything hit you all at once. Remember, this too shall pass- But not just yet. A conjunction to Poseidon  confirms this, rocking you to your very core and challenging the structures that you have built your life upon. An opposition to Hebe demands to know why you are still serving anyone else? Don't you realize you still have a life of your own to live? Don't fly into slavery just to avoid being pushed into the same. A trine to Urania confirms this, but she demands you do something big, and do it now. A square to Diana scares you into giving up your short term wants for your long term freedom (albeit under duress!). Own it and make it your choice- Its not like you can really do anything else, might as well use it! An opposition to Phaethon shows that you really need to be careful of who you trust- you may find yourself crashing and burning instead of having that person to protect you when they said they would. A square to Hermes should help you to talk and think your way out of any trouble you may find yourself in though!

Neptune- Last, but not least, the Guardian of the Edges, the Watcher of the Waters: Neptune. Our soggy, seaweed-brained storm god is rather quiet (which is always worrying... still waters run very deep with him, and you never know whats hiding down there), other than the opposition to Orcus that I have nothing left to write on at the moment, and a rather curious conjunction to Nemesis. You are challenged not to allow the changes of an inconstant and fickle Fortune to turn you bitter and angry. No, you must let your grudges wash over you instead, dropping the hot coal in your hand without finding a target to throw it at. Do this and succeed- Lash out in prideful anger and it is you who will be struck. You choose.

This is where I leave you, guys. This is once in a lifetime Astro, and it has major gifts for those who tap into it and use it for what it is- a personal Renaissance. No matter what you choose to do, make sure it is a path that YOU choose, and one that you commit to 100%. This is not the Astro for half-assing anything!

Let me leave you with this- it sums up the Astro pretty damn perfectly

Hang on tight and ride it for all its worth, Hell-raisers!

-The AstroGeek

Also we're now into Starzina's birthday season, so go over and pay the gal a visit, wont you? Its hard on her, gearing up to turn the big 2-7! I know it would mean the world if you go over and check out the page, share the videos with everyone you know, and maybe put in a word over with your cousin who's a producer out in L.A. (and actually, do your pal Astro a solid on that one too!)

For reasons that defy both Astro and Starzina's imagination, Starzina's newest video is not playing nice (trust an Aries...) but we have a handy link to it, here. Apologies for subjecting you to an extra click, Hell-raisers

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Venus in Aries- G.I. Jane

Not even a day into Aries and we already have to deal with Venus. Girl is on fire right now, figuratively speaking. As she moves into Aries (Gearing up for my personal Venus Return!) get your ass ready to go conquer the world. That's right guys, i'm officially giving you my blessing to quit the skullduggery and innuendo (not that you needed it, or are inclined to care at the moment!), and start putting all those schemes and plots into action! Besides, Aries is a god-awful time to try to get away with any bullshit, its nigh-impossible.

So how to use this she-devil, Hell-on-high-heels energy? Of course it all depends on your chart, but as a general rule; Go for the simple yet audacious, don't back down or shy away from anything you want, strip away any guile or deception, conquer on the battlefield, and when all else fails- just ask for what you want! You might be surprised.

Don't get too bogged down by admin crap and the little things- Find someone you trust to help you work out the details, trust me. And try not to overdo it, nothing is worse than Aries energy that gets out of control, except maybe Aries with no challenges or outlet! And no, there arent enough hours in the day.

This is exactly what the Doctor ordered though (hehehe!) and will help you get out of your current slump/ ennui/ doldrums. Channel it correctly, push yourself, keep climbing, and  you'll shock both yourself and all those around you. Seriously. Aries thats applied and directed is pure dead magic. The best part? Its magic that comes from you- All you need to do is put in the sweat equity!

Oh and of course, we're gearing up for the Mars/Venus conjunction, so watch out for that.

To the Victor go the spoils!
-The AstroGeel 

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Solstice/ Easter/ Aries- Hurdles

Hellraisers, it is my distinct pleasure to welcome you all back to ARIES SEASON! We're so happy you could all make it, and while we're on the subject, let me wish you a Happy New Year for what is at least the 17th time this year, further proving the absolute insanity of the Calendar. Anyway, y'all may have noticed that Astro has been conspicuously absent from his own site, and as such you all are the ones to suffer. For that, im genuinely sorry. This Pisces trek was not an easy one for Astro, but since its now Aries, none of that matters and shall not be discussed again.

So to discuss Pisces, as we bid it a not-so-fond farewell, we're all going to do an exercise- I want you to take a minute and close your eyes. Shut up, you can take A MINUTE. Good. Now im hoping you read this whole thing in advance, or itll get awkward as you look up from your exercise all the time- defeats the purpose. Since you did read ahead however, you know that next I want you to just stop. This is hard. Stop everything, stop listening, stop all thought, stop doing anything. Just turn off for a second. Two. Three. Breathe. I want you to think about 2012. What mistakes did you make? Why are you still torturing yourself for them? Think about it, and then I want you to forgive yourself. Say it out loud if it helps. I forgive myself for _________. Sure, it might not work the first time, but its a start. Repeat til it sticks.

So, Aries!! Time to go out, be bloody bold, and resolute, as you take what you want, compete in the grand game that is our lives, and furthermore WIN!! Of course, itd be boring if it was just a straight shot to the finish line, so life in all of her bitchiness has designed several traps and tricks coming up here to trip you up. Not to worry though, im here to make sure you avoid them all and coach you through to the end.

First up- The planets were all lined up for a trick shot in Pisces, and now they're all shifting into Aries, and let me tell you, its a whole different ball game there. Mars, the ruler of Aries, is already here, and hes been ACTIVE. If you havent felt it, you're probably so underground that you're in a cave, and then who will see you in all of your elitist glory? Anyway, these guys are all shuffling into Aries, and once they do, they have to run the Uranus gauntlet. On the other side of him lies Pallas Athene, and you bet your ass you better have a battle plan ready for her, otherwise she'll just straight-up eviscerate you.

Now there is one of these I feel duty-bound to mention- Later on (2 weeks-ish) this season, we have a very special configuration in the sky: Mars is moving to conjoin Venus! I love this conjunction, Its one of my favorites. The lovers meet, and for a time, all is right with the world again. Or not, it really all depends. In Aries? No matter what else, you can bet your ass there will be fireworks! But more on that when we get there.

Also we're now into Starzina's birthday season, so go over and pay the gal a visit, wont you? Its hard on her, gearing up to turn the big 2-7! I know it would mean the world if you go over and check out the page, share the videos with everyone you know, and maybe put in a word over with your cousin who's a producer out in L.A. (and actually, do your pal Astro a solid on that one too!)

Til we meet again guys!!
-The AstroGeek

Monday, March 4, 2013

Saturn Sextile Scorpio (and Trine Chiron)- Scar Tissue

Show of hands- Who feels like this right now? All of you (Including your humble Astrologer)? Good, you're not lying to yourself. Awesome, you're ahead of the game. So, here's the rules for the next round:

Saturn and Pluto are resuming their fuqery- Enjoy that. If that wasn't enough, Chiron is also coming to the party too. Fun times, aye? So since we haven't really had a chance to sit down and talk about it, man to audience, I think its high time we made this happen.

Lets start from the outside in- Pluto: The black, dread lord of Hell. The bastard is in Capricorn (Saturn's Sign) and has been raking you over the coals since about 2008. This produces one of two extreme effects- Either you break under his torture, or you get stronger and use his power as your own. More often then not however, one leads to the other with our Dark Lord. Still, we're stuck in his particular hell till about 2024, so not much we can do about the situation, except for to manage as best as possible, be relentlessly upwardly mobile at all times, and make sure to grab a piece of the pie for you and yours- screw anyone else.

Saturn of course, is currently in Scorpio (Pluto's Sign)- So the two create a mutual reception, strenthening and supporting each others goals, giving each other a strong ally. Saturn is of course, the Lord of Time and is a relentless teacher of his lessons- But very generous to those that he favors and the ones who choose to work with him instead of fighting. In Scorpio, he is the torturer that forces you to rake others over the coals, speeding up the Pluto process. However if you only agree to do it, and abandon your own inhibitions toward it, then the rewards are palpable- You become a King of Hell, in and of a sort.

Chiron is the wild card- Not part of the mutual reception, and in Pisces with Neptune (but far enough away not to exacerbate matters), Chiron is someone we haven't spent nearly enough time talking about. However, I could devote every post from now til the end of the site and I still couldnt cover Chiron enough. Chiron is the Master, the Wounded Healer who is both animal and man, and uses his wisdom (and pain) to train up Heroes. He takes regular, broken down and tired people and transforms them into brilliant, shining amazing specimens of what we could all be, at our best. He takes us in and shares what he knows, for our own benefit, so that we can go out and share it with others to make the world better, however we can.

Now how to read these three together? I assure you, it would be much easier if we didnt have a huge, fuck-off stellium in Pisces muddying up the already very cloudy waters- The Sun, Mercury Retro, Venus, Mars,  and Neptune (the sign Ruler), all cozied up together (well, give or take a few degrees). But we do, so there you have it. Anyway, this gives all three of the players listed above a major power boost, so they are given even more importance. At least if you listen to them, that is.

Anyway, how it goes is something like this- Pluto cuts you off at the knees, breaks and tortures you, bringing back all of your old pain and baggage that you refuse to deal with. Then Saturn swoops in, scoops you up and says "Look, you know what would help you and make you feel a lot better? Making someone ELSE feel what you've been put through. Here, let me show you how its done." From there, you learn, and get more proficient, but emotionally you're frozen and even more broken then before. At your worst, enter Chiron. He grips you tight, and lifts you out of Perdition- taking you back to his cave, a safe place, and he helps you heal.

Once you confront your demons, and learn to laugh at them, then you do the process in reverse- You go back to the gates of hell, kick them in, and help others to get free when and where you can. You learn the hard lessons, like how not everyone can be, or even wants to be, saved; And even when you save them, they never thank you (Saturn)- but you save a couple. You make a difference. Not as much as you may want, but never discount a small action- they usually have the greatest effects. You pass on what you know, and what you learned. You learn a couple things yourself! You see it all again, through their eyes, and it gives you a fresh perspective. You come away changed, and better for it- Rooted in a strong sense of Self and embracing your own power, you become magnificent (Pluto).

As to what happens after that, well thats entirely up to you. Besides, id hate to ruin the surprise!

-The Astrogeek