Sweet Khakhabaisaywa, whoever snapped this picture needs to be given a medal (Reddit, can we get on this? Im sure we can enlist Shitty_Watercolour to make something up).
ASTROLOGER'S NOTE- So sorry about the lateness of this post guys. A pressing matter came up that demanded my full, undivided attention. All I can say is that I took a risk to save something very imporatant to me, and I accomplished my mission. Worth it.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Its time to hook yourselves up to the Tesla coil that is the Full Moon in Aquarius, so book your tickets to Botswana for that awesome Heavy Metal festival that you cant pronounce and get ready to just wreck the place. God help us.
Getting right to it...
The Sun and Moon- Allright, this one is going to feel like offering a nice, cool, glass of water to a drowning man. Starting out with a square to Deucalion, you have to keep moving even though you just want to curl up in the basement until the Jehovah Witnesses leave and the block party is over. Exercising your social muscles is key. A sextile to Jupiter confirms this by grabbing the nearest bullhorn to shout about it in the center of town. A trine to Uranus shows that something will come out of the blue and completely blindside you, throwing you off track. Stay focused and try to recover as quickly as possible, but don't hesitate to adjust your plans and give your full attention if that's what the situation calls for. A quincunx to Pluto shows that you will need to make a hard choice, and it will take a lot of chutzpah, but a risk taken will pay off. A square to Ceto tells you to be wary of those who do not have your best interests at heart, and when in doubt, trust yourself rather than someone else. A sextile to Pallas Athene and a trine to Minerva indicates that poor decision making now could very easily be your undoing. Stick to the plan. A sextile to Magdalena tells you to have faith, even though the results of your hard work are not immediately visible. Trust in the process. A sextile to Klotho tells you that you have a lot of opportunities to change your story, if you want to; More things are possible right now than you could imagine. Capitalize on the moment.
Mercury- A trine to the Nodes has you thinking long and hard on your future, and vehemently scheming and planning your way out of the flourescent hell you find yourself stuck in, but make no commitments just yet, and dont do anything overly stupid. Keep everything nebulous and pull the ripcord at the first sign of trouble. A conjunction to Dionysius hears all this, and acknowledges that it is really good advice, then promptly heads off to get sloshed. A sextile to Itokawa and Apophis warns against too much fun however, as you never know what kind of trouble you can stir up from an ill-informed choice.
Venus- Our girl is still partying hard in Gemini, but getting ready to mix it up in Cancer and set off the Cardnal Crisis again. A trine to Nessus warns you to trust in your partner; If there is doubt, start a conversation and talk about what's bothering you. Making assumptions or acting on an emotional decision could prove catastrophic for both of you. A square to Logos confirms this, advising you to think before you leap, and be very cautious. A trine to Saturn shows that anything can be overcome, as long as its for real. Sincerity, honesty, and commitment will win the day. A conjunction to Thereus shows that if any change is going to come about, it will be by your own hand- Grow a pair and take action (and even more importantly, take the consequences that go along with it). A square to Salacia has convinced you that what you have now is not what you actually want, and are therefore unhappy. Like I keep saying, define what you want and what would bring you fulfillment, and then go after it with all that you have. A sextile to Bacchus should actually help matters for once, helping to spur you on to actually chase down and tackle your dreams (no, that does not mean go chase down and tackle Scarlett Johanssen, that will get you arrested).
Mars- A conjunction to Haumea shows that you are now faced with the choice to perfect what you have or to create something totally new. Dont give up too soon on something that hasn't yet reached its potential. A sextile to Pholus should tell you which way to take, and it is something that has been clear for some time. Another sextile, to Ixion, shows the potential for some epicially bad decision making, and the consequences of that could be very devastating. A trine to Chaos and to Siva shows that even though the situation may be grim now, and what you have been clinging onto to help you hold it together may be breaking up beneath your feet, you cant let it stop you, because it is making way for something new to come. The challenge is that you need to be the one to shape it. An opposition to Child and Ascelpius shows that the only way that you can stop the raging thoughts and doubts in your head and heart is to move forward, maturely and without drama, and do what you know must be done. I cant tell you what this is, you need to make the choices for yourself.
Jupiter- A trine to Minerva lends you perspective. This too shall pass. Another trine, to Klotho, tells you that you have made the right choice and this is the start of a new day for you. Keep moving forward, and never back; you're not going that way. A square to Hermes may make it hard to find the right words, and even if you do find them, its doubtful that they will be well received. A square to Chiron reminds you that your choices have brought you to this point, it is up to you to accept the consequences of your actions. A sextile to Uranus may inspire you to take swift action to disentangle yourself from a very bad situation. Dont allow yourself to slip back if your mind is made up. A quincunx to Pluto confirms this, and demands that you fight for what you want. It will be a very hard battle, but walk into the arena with your head held high, even if you're not sure that you will emerge victorious.
Saturn- A square to Varuna brings new information to light, and an opposition to Eris makes sure that it is very chaotic and will fuck up your day. A square to Photographica indicates that you havent been listening to me when I tell you to keep your nose clean, or this could have been avoided. Stay out of the limelight. An opposition to Bacchus tells you that you need to keep a level head. Dont hesitate to do what is necessary, however.
Uranus- A trine to Chariklo says there is information floating around that you do not have access to, and it might just prove detrimental if you dont get to it soon. A sextile to Vesta may be holding you back in the name of loyalty. Know when to say no. An opposition to Pandora tells us that this is a flashpoint, and there is no group finder- You have to go in solo. Be ready for insanity, and when all else fails, bail. A trine to Eurydike tells you to start forming an exit strategy, and do so with as little drama as possible. A trine to Hidalgo tells us that if you need to prove something, you need to go all out- be as impulsive and showy as possible to win the day.
Neptune- A square to the Nodes shows that the moment is fluid, and anything is possible. An opposition to Orcus tells you to choose carefully, because every choice has reprecussions that aren't easily visible at the onset. A conjunction to Hygeia confirms this, and tells you to be in the moment, and go with what is true at that second. These days, that's as good as it gets. A trine to Hades tells you that you will make the right move when it counts, just do it with confidence and do not allow doubt into your mind. A square to Itokawa confirms this, and tells you to wait on judgement until after the smoke clears.
Pluto- Lets see, a sextile to Teharonhiawako, thats old news... An opposition to Kronos, however puts the desire for the best possible outcome for you personally as your main driving force. Aim for the top. A sextile to Eros provokes some very strong feelings and passions in you. Dont allow them to drive you to something you'll regret. An opposition to Orpheus confirms this, but does nothing to keep you from making poor decisions. Dont give in to your baser nature. A sextile to Chiron also influences this, and is a good measure of how far you've come, and how strong your resolve is.
Stay strong guys, and take big chances
As always, go check out the always fabulous Starzina Starfish-Browne and her Time of the Month Horoscopes!
And your songs of the Zeitgeist. Never let it be said that I choose my songs for any particular reason (even when its completely true)-