Ceres in Aries- Kakodyl

Hot - Ashlea Louise - Great British Tattoo Show 2014, London by Darren Johnson/ iDJPhotography, CCL

Effective date of transit: 4/15-7/18/16

“There’s a tendency to mistake preparation for productivity. You can prepare all you want, but if you never roll the dice you’ll never be successful.” ~ Shia LaBeouf

Helios ASTROLOGICAL reading of Ceres in Aries- Look at that woman up there. She is confident as shit, swallowing a flaming stick, in nothing but (very provocative) lingerie, showing herself and her awesome tattoos. God, I think I'm in love... Anyway, this is your role model for Ceres in Aries- Be bloody, bold and resolute! (laugh to scorn the power of man, for none of woman born shall harm MacBeth! [Sorry, can't help myself. Grew up more on a stage than in a house, and always had a special place for the Scottish Play- That line is burned into my memory. Its even a much used tag here! Go on, click it- you know you want to!])

Now, while Ceres was in Pisces, you were beat down pretty hard. Shit got heaped on you over and over again, and now you are buried under it, defeated and reeking to high heaven. You didn't know what to do to get out from under it or how to go about doing it, so you were paralyzed. You gave up, and let it happen. You did what you had to do to get through- You have to forgive yourself for that, stop tormenting yourself over the past; it is set in stone and done (well, not from a non-linear quantum/multiverse perspective, but still)- you have the present to worry about.

This transit is a major shift in the energy. This is what you need. This is where you start to stand up, shake off the merde, and get the fuck out of the quagmire you have become stuck in. This is action, this is unapologetic candor and unleashing the awesome that you have held back. If you wait to do so you will suffocate and die under your own guilt and regret. Do not allow that to happen- and make no mistake, indolence now is equivalent to suicide. Do not resist the flow by staying stuck where you are- Get out NOW, consequences be damned. Get to where you need to be to succeed. If you can't make it happen right this second, start planning ASAP. No one is coming to do it for you. No one else gives a shit. Go do it yourself or it WILL NOT GET DONE.

Let me regale you with a story that is not that well known about Ceres/Demeter. Now, if you have the faintest idea who she is, you probably know her from her supporting role in the Original Lifetime Movie that is the Persephone saga, but what if I told you that she had her own adventures while she was wandering the earth, looking for her lost daughter? WELL SHE DID. The one in particular I want to discuss is the Demophon story, aka the Elusian Mystery Cult.

Abridged version- Persephone flees is abducted from her extremely overprotective Mother who abandoned her in a random field. Persephone is taken to the underworld, to be Hades' bride, but no one but Helios and Hecate seem to know what happened and they refuse to speak because Zeus arranged this and swore them to silence. Ceres rants to Zeus, and refuses to allow the crops to grow, and all life on earth is threatened while she goes wandering the earth to find Persephone. In her wanderings, just as she is about to give up, she takes a break at Elusis, where she meets the queen, who just so happens to need a nursemaid for her son, Demophon. Demophon is sick, and Ceres takes care of him while his parents run the country or whatever. Now, they are kind of nice to her, so she decides to repay them by making Demophon immortal, because that's just something she can sort of do I guess... She takes him off of people food and feeds him solely Nectar and Ambrosia, the food and drink of the gods, which gives them their strength and immortality [partially]. The other part of the immortality process is a bit trickier though...  She plunges the poor kid into a blazing fire nightly, burning away his mortality. One night, as she was almost done with the process, the queen barges in, and understandably flips her shit, sending Ceres into one of her now-famous tirades. Meanwhile, Demophon gets left in the fire too long, and he burns to death, which of course Ceres blames on the queen for being a shitty parent. Right around this time Helios and Zeus decide its a good idea for a reunion between mother and daughter, and send Mercury off to facilitate it, leading to more wacky underworld hi-jinks and shenanigans, but before she leaves she teaches agriculture to a random kid, saving Greece and humanity from dying out the next time an insane, grief stricken mother goddess ravages the earth out of pettiness.

Even though he dies at the end, Demophon finds life as a central figure in the Elusian Mystery cult, a religion focused on life, death, rebirth ad the underworld. They believed this story (along with other secrets they held) could provide clues as to the method Ceres used to make Demophon immortal, so that they could do it themselves.

Ceres can burn away the impurities in you and raise you up higher than you ever dreamed. All you have to do is let her.

Artemis' TAROT reading of Ceres in Aries

“Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.”  ― Benjamin Franklin


Ceres is the mother.  According to myth, her mourning of Proserpina's return to the underworld is what brings us the cycle of the seasons; and therefore she is also the ruler of the great cycles in our life.  When floating through the arena of Aries, she becomes a fierce mother who teaches through action and fosters independence.  

Ceres in Aries is my personal natal position for the great mother, so her dark mama approach is very familiar to me.  She doesn’t take shit, she will push you into the deep end of the pool so you have no choice but to learn how to swim, and she will test you at every turn.  This is how a Ceres in Aries person teaches and this is how they learn.  Ceres in Aries will make sure that we are ready for this next step in our journey, and she will be our partner in crime along the way.  People ruled by this energy to not sit well with being told how to do just about anything.  They are happy to take suggestions and advice, but in the end you must KNOW that it is their choice what they do with their life.  And they want the same for you.

What does that mean for us?  Well, it means that a time is coming where we are going to start standing up for the things we want - no matter what other people might think of them.  That's a pretty amazing energy.  

For this ingress, I pulled The Sun crossed by The Hangman.  The rune that will clarify the energy is Hagalaz (hailstorm).  It’s time to grow up.  It’s time to regain our independence and our ability to drive our own fucking life.  We are familiar with all of the things we need to tackle and all of the things we need to get rid of in order to start our new life.  At our center, we know what we need to do, and we're finally ready to do it.  Something is urgently whispering, "There is no time like right now!"  You will finally have the drive to start taking action and pushing yourself, and those you care for, into more expressed versions of yourselves. 

The way toward thriving is to get up and take what you need.  Inaction and suspended ego are not going to work for you right now.  The Hangman is water, he is stillness, he is quietly peering into the next dimension.  He is willingness to let go of the ego, and he is not boding well for our ego infused happy sun energy that is trying to shine out.  Sometimes we need the ego.  Sometimes we really need it to puff us up and give us power to actually manifest shit in our lives.  Put yourself out there!

Because Ceres is entering Aries, I get a feeling that we are all being re-born as a new version of ourselves.  We are infants in this new stage, feeling out how to use our brand new powers.  The best way?  Ceres in Aries says just DO.  Play.  Act.  Take initiative and dive in.  It doesn't matter if you have a plan or not - do something.  It's the only way to learn how you need to proceed from here.

Compete playfully with your friends (this will be a great way to recharge during this period).  Look at the things in your life with child-like eyes.  This sense of independence and curiosity is exactly what we will need in order to keep afloat with the wacky energies coming our way the next few months.  Don’t fear.  Ceres in Aries doesn’t have time for fear in the midst of doing.  We WILL do this, and we will do this together.  The real question is...  Can you keep up?

TAROT READING:  The Sun CROSSED BY The Hangman

RUNE:  Hagalaz 

Venus in Aries- Cadence

Bella Jovan by Jackie Baisa, CCL

Helios' ASTROLOGICAL reading of Venus in Aries (4/6-5/1/16)
"If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?" -Rupaul

Okay, so I love this transit. Shocking, I know, as Venus and I NEVER get along. Luckily, this is my natal placement so this is the one time we can stop fighting and work together, like a hero-villan teamup. The peace is usually more or less kept until Cancer, and then its back at each others throats... But thats another day. This is Aries!!!

Now, the key to this transit is in that quote. Now I live for all things Rupaul, and I have heard that particular quote more times than I can count, but it was always one that I have just brushed off, it's just her send-off every episode (if you dont know Rupaul, or any of her wildly successful shows, please stop what you are doing and go binge on them IMMEDIATELY). The thing is though, the more you think about it, the more profound it is. If you cant love yourself, how can you love anyone else? I mean you can pretend, sure. But can you REALLY feel love for anyone else if you don't show it and give it to yourself, first and foremost? How is that fair to you? Are you not deserving of your own love?

At that last question you should have had a knee-jerk reaction, a small voice in the back of your head involuntarily whispering "no". I want you to chase down the source of that insecurity, really sit with and be present with it- figure out why it is that you have conditioned yourself to think so little of yourself, treating yourself so badly. When you realize what it is, it will probably be a surface-level bad thing you did, or habit/addiction you have, whatever- Dig deeper and you will find that that pattern or action has come about BECAUSE of your lack of self-love. Once you dig deeper than that and expose the real fear at the core, the magic will happen.

I am hardly one to lecture on this. I will be the first to admit that I LOATHE myself, I can't stand my own company at all. I am harder on myself than I will ever need to be, and harder than anyone else ever could be. I am so cruel to myself that it could be seen as a breach of my constitutional rights under the 8th Amendment. I am not good at what this transit is challenging us to do. Still, we MUST do this and we have to get it right. We will do it together, and lordt knows its going to be a rough ride. Luckily, I can call in a favor on this one. My good friend Asmoday has prepared a great lesson and exercise on how to overcome this, and I can personally attribute to its effectiveness.

We can do this. We can do better. We can stop being frauds and finally reach our true potential, not being hindered by ourselves. We can overcome our saboteur.

Can I get an Amen?


Artemis TAROT reading of Venus in Aries

Cards:  3 of Cups and Ace of Wands

“One bowman must hunt Sekhmet-Hathor… as she shifts, one phase Destroyer of Humankind, the next, Goddess of Love…” – On the Scarlet Lady, Unknown

No human can stand in a fire and not be consumed.  But we have no choice, do we?  Venus is entering Aries, and she becomes like Helen of Troy in this cosmic coupling.  We will be COMPELLED as if by some magnetic force toward the things we desire.  We will find excitement here, and a new sense of daring.  Dare to take that leap into love that Aries do so well (though ever fleeting, god damn commitment-phobe rams).  There is a lot of impulsive fire coming from this tarot reading, so I’m sure there will be a tremendous amount of impulsive romantic and sexual activity kicking in.  The Tarot cards I drew to describe the energy that is coming from this configuration are the 3 of Cups and Ace of Wands; both very spontaneous energies. 

I’m really relieved, guys.  We really needed this kind of energy to carry us through the next few weeks.  This transit actually looks really, really good.  I know Helios is just as excited for this Venus in Aries as I am.  We both kinda have an Aries fetish.  Not gunna lie. 

I can already hear the egos of every single Aries inflating as they read that.

People who are born with Venus in Aries in their natal charts are very courageous lovers.  They will immediately pursue an object of their desire and usually succeed in getting what they want.  Why?  Because who the hell doesn't love to feel desired?  Aries energy is lifeblood.  We crave it.  We get drunk off of it and end up doing stupid shit.  But, you know what?  It's FINE.  “Why is it fine, Artemis?”  WELL, because looking at the card reading, it looks like that very 3 of Cups fun loving, drunkenness is what is going to lead to the creative fire that is the Ace of Wands.  The 3 of Cups is traditionally depicted as 3 women having a blast dancing together (probably getting smashed off of wine).  It’s letting go.  It’s allowing a situation to turn into a fun time. 

We are all fucking stressed and broken down from what we see looming ahead of us and all of the corpses of our enemies behind us.  Let Aries do us this one solid and ride the chill the fuck out Venus train.  3 of Cups represents play and carefree socializing.  We have to learn to let go and trust and succumb to Venusean love energy right now. 

Am I asking you to play with fire?  Yes. 

Don’t hesitate.  An Aries never hesitates.  The cards are saying, “If you do this (if you emanate the 3 of cups), you will be rewarded with the Ace of Wands.”  What is the ace of wands? Well, punks, it is the symbol for pure sex and creativity.  It is the divine spark.  It is the first whisperings of a muse in your ear.  It is the smirk on an artist’s face as they suddenly realize exactly what they need to do.  It is inspiration in its purest and most malleable form.

Where is the seat of all creativity?  The Hindu Chakra system would say the Sacral Chakra.  Yes, that would be your sex chakra (also associated with self-worth).  The tarot would say the suit of Wands, which is also associated with sexuality.  The desires that Venus brings to us alchemically transform us.  No human can stand in a fire and not be consumed.  It’s time to take the Aries leap of faith and rise from the ashes. 

In short: Pursue the things you love with zeal, no hesitation, and do it genuinely.  Flowing, not fighting against them, is best right now because the things that you desire will be harder to resist anyway.  Probably for good reason.  It’s fine.  If you give in, the cards say you will get a nice, inspirational reward.  Probably a muse.

Cross your fingers for a muse. 

Please allow yourself to receive the word of our Lady of Beauty and Love!  I promise you the communion is far more fun than that of most of the other stiff collared gods.  

TNO Watch: Pandora

Pandora by Miriam Capone, CCL

Ah, I do love the New Year! My favorite time of year! Well, Solar New Year that is- Gregorian is lame, who wants to celebrate in January? Dull, grey and cold- No thanks! Chinese is all right though- Now that's a party! But for me, I will always wait to really celebrate til late March- And the best part of any New Year is all the possibilities that the next 365(ish) days have to offer! Which leads me to our TNO...

The Astronomy: 55 Pandora is a fairly large and very bright asteroid in the asteroid belt. Pandora was discovered by American astronomer and catholic priest George Mary Searle on September 10, 1858 from the Dudley Observatory near Albany, NY. It was his first and only asteroid discovery. It is named after Pandora, the first woman in Greek mythology, who unwisely opened a box that released evil into the world. The name was apparently chosen by Blandina Dudley, widow of the founder of the Dudley Observatory, who had been involved in an acrimonious dispute with astronomer B. A. Gould. Gould felt that the name had an "apt significance". [Shaaaaaaaaaaade] The asteroid shares its name with Pandora, a moon of Saturn. Photometric observations of this asteroid at the Rozhen Observatory in Bulgaria during 2010 gave a light curve with a period of 4.7992 hours and a brightness variation of Δm=0.22 mag. This is consistent with a period of 4.804 hours and an amplitude of 0.24 obtained during a 1977 study.

The Mythology: Okay, settle in because this one is a doozy and incredibly convoluted. Sure, we all know her box (giggity), is a trope that's been done to death. The story goes like this: Prometheus creates (or discovers) the race of Man, only men- no women. He runs out of all the good stuff that he and his brother Epimethus used on creating other stuff like snakes and the platypus, so he steals fire from Olympos and Zeus. This was the final straw in Zeus and Prometheus' epic rivalry/prank war, and it earns the Titan a lovely rock to get chained to, allowing better access for the eagle to peck out his liver every day. He got off easy- His brother, Epimethus, got the far more devastating and creative punishment: A woman. See, up until this point, humanity was comprised only of men- Deathless, hardworking, and obedient to the gods. Zeus decided that the price for fire (advancement) was death and a loss of paradise. He called the gods together and had Hephaestus make a woman (which, if he could do, brings into question the whole Aphrodite story arc of his, but hey), and all the gods gave her gifts to help make her a more appealing prize: Aphrodite gave her beauty unparalleled, Athene gave her useful skills, and Hermes gave her a brilliant mind, cunning, boldness, a deceitful nature, and got to name her: "All-endowed", while the other female gods (including The Fates!) dressed her up and gave her sparkly things to wear. At this point a theme should be emerging for you. She was sent off to her new husband with a big ol' jar (not actually a box. I want to stress that) with all of life's ills inside and a note not to ever open it. Epimethus was warned by his brother never to accept any gifts from the colossal bag of dicks that was Zeus, but as Epimethus wasn't exactly the brightest bulb in the old Titan hierarchy (his name meant Afterthought, for chrissakes...) he gladly accepted the wonderfully packaged doom that was hand-delivered to him. Temptation to open the jar is abated for a while, but soon one of their curiosities gets the better of them and they open it, unleashing all the worst things humanity has ever dealt with, but they manage to shut it with one thing left inside: Hope. Which is the insanely interesting part- Why would hope, one of the most valued human traits, be at the bottom of a jar containing nothing but the worst things imaginable? Why would Zeus, trying to punish us, give us hope? Did he feel bad unleashing the rest of it on us, and wanted to leave us something to get us through our now-miserable lives? Or is it possible that hope is its own form of torment, and owning to its placement in the jar, truly the most painful and insidious? Anyway she goes on to live a crappy life, despised by everyone, and then has a daughter (further hurting her cause) who ends up saving humanity after Zeus gets pissy at us again. 
Why She Matters: God, I love her. She's amazing. She is a slightly lighter version of Eris or Lilith, but she is still absolutely hell on high heels. She is the living embodiment of the idea that "Bitches get shit done". Every single person who has been shut out of the patriarchal white straight boys club has a hero in Pandora. She was given gifts, and they were promptly ignored by everyone, most of all her creators, just because she was a woman! Astrologically, she refuses to take it. Wherever she shows up in your chart is where you refuse to allow it to happen, whether to you or anyone else. You stand up and be counted. Pandora takes no shit, that's for sure. She's no good little housewife who stays quiet with a martini glass waiting for husband to come home from work, she is every bit his better! More often than not that is the case in real life as well. Pandora impels you to do for yourself and help those who are marginalized make their voices heard. Its also a point where you will find the world reject you, and you will have an uphill battle to get the recognition you want and deserve. But you probably already knew this.
To locate asteroid 55 Pandora in your natal chart, head over to astro.com and input the number 55 in the ‘additional objects’ section. Keep your aspects major – conjunction, square, opposition and your orbs within 1 degree. Where does Pandora show up in your life?

Venus in Virgo: Lets Get Physical, Physical

Well shit, its time for Venus to switch signs again. This time, its Virrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgo. Holy bajayzus, what a ride through Leo that was, huh? Well, the scene is about to change very drastically...

Ladies and gentlemen, the focus is shifting from strutting around knowing you are the HBIC to stepping back and getting your awesome on behind the scenes. Ignore this at your own peril, because the skies are not looking good for any kind of egoism or bombast (especially for the Geminis in the audience, but we'll get to that). Humility is key, and its low-key at that. Notice that does not say passivity. No, you need to be raging on the inside and just barely covering it up in order to function.

Now you cant run full-tilt like this, or you'll end up burnt out and no fun at parties. No, you need an outlet or you will drive yourself batshit crazy. Now, if you know where Virgo is in your chart, then do that full-tilt. If you dont, then just focus on getting your overall fitness and health tip-top. For instance, Virgo is square in my 8th House, so my focus is primarily on my financial fitness and getting rid of any and all debt ASAP.

Venus is also in charge of money (on a day-to-day personal level [but not when it comes to actual transactions]) so this could very well be a boon to a stagnant sector for your finances. The best possible use of these would be to invest in yourself now. Health, fitness, education, job skills, anything that is strictly about you bettering yourself is money well spent.

If you have to tighten your belt a little to make it work I must stress the importance of making ends meet the right way, however you define it. Do not break your own or societys rules to make it work ,and for the love of Inanna, keep your nose clean at all times. Friends or associates that are less than pillars of society? Ditch them for a month or two.

Now I would be remisss if I neglected to mention that Venus in Virgo is going to be fantastic support to all that is happening with the Scorpio Black Ops nonsense. Think of it like this, if all the boys (Mars, Mercury and Saturn) are the mobsters, Venus is the accountant who keeps 6 sets of books, one for the Feds, one to be caught with, one for each of the boys, and the real one for herself. This girl is good. She is the real power behind the throne.

This month, strive for perfection wherever possible, however you define that. Get your house in order, get up a little earlier to get your cardio in, and dont forget to take your supplements. Play by the rules and you'll get through just fine.

Oh yeah, this is just Round 1 of an insane 5 days of the Planets jockeying for position, changing signs and changing direction. Stay frosty.

-The AstroGeek