Thursday, July 12, 2012

Uranus Retrograde- Back That Thang Up

Ladies and Gentlemen, I am eating cake for breakfast. Why, you ask? For Science!! Also, because cake is delicious (not to mention because Astro is experiencing the double whammy of Uranus Square Uranus and Uranus Sextile Sun, which has him convinced that nothing can hold him back and also that he is a strong, confident black woman).

Anyway, lets talk about Uranus (It could do with a wash). Its about to go Retrograde and that is a good thing (depending on the placement of Uranus, of course). Basically, this Retrograde is also one that is usually maligned (Uranus is just so misunderstood) but is actually really, really awesome if you know what you're doing (ok, that one wrote itself).

So astrologically, Uranus usually means things like novelty, innovation, new ideas and discoveries, freedom, breaking away from tradition and the like. And when a planet goes Retrograde, their influence is felt internally, rather than through outside stimuli and experiences; it becomes much more subjective and personal. With Uranus, It becomes all about the individual expression of personal freedom and creativity. Especially now, with his journey through Aries.

"Ok, thats all well and good, but what does it mean for me Astro?" "Well", random person who is too impatient to let me finish making a point, "What you are actually asking is how to rock this transit for personal glory, so know what you're asking before you come up in my house! The best way to rock this transit, since you asked, is to face down the chance you have to change your life in ways that you have never even dreamed about before but scares you beyond belief, grab it by the nads and say hello. THEN, while your fear is trying to hold you back and keep you living small, give it a nice pistol-whip and go do what you need to do instead of sitting on your ass dicking around on (Facebook, reddit, twitter, what have you) all day until you have to go to your just-above-minimum-wage job to be treated like shit, overwork and go home to leftover chinese food and mustard."

Of course, this isnt complete until we talk about the other players in the game- Pluto and Mars at the moment, to be specific. Pluto has been dancing around a square to Uranus for the last two years, and Mars has just entered opposition. "I dont understand any of that, Astro! What does it mean?" Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, I have to make a call. "Hey Tony, whats up? Thats good, same here...What? Oh, she's fine, cant complain. Yeah... Hey listen, I was wondering if you could do me a favor. Yeah, I got another one. Cleanup detail only. No, the wood chipper is fine, no one's going to miss this one. Yeah ill get the prep work done, you just worry about the disposal. Ok, awesome. Give my best to Sheila." Anyway, where were we? Oh yes, Cardinal Crisis. So we have Pluto demanding deep and powerful changes, and Uranus telling us they need to be done YESTERDAY, with Mars sitting in the back, just not wanting to do anything unless its what everybody wants (while actually blocking all progress unless it suits his agenda) and making you do all the legwork yourself.

So what do you do? Use Mars for your zen and strike at the correct moment, Uranus as your architect for success, never sacrificing a thing but what doesn't work anymore, and let Pluto bring it all together by just never letting yourself quit. Ever. Be Adamant and unyielding, never swaying in your determination and duty.

Yes life will still be scary and confusing. And no, it wont stop being that way just for you and because its hard. Grow the fuck up and take control of yourself.You have the chance to change your life, it is within your grasp. You just have to want it. Of course, if you let your fear rule you, then you're already lost. Conquer it and seize the day (and Uranus).  

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go throw up my cake as it is making me very very sick. Honestly, who eats cake for breakfast?

-The AstroGeek

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